Alli and Maggie........and Lucky?

While I've used this photo in the past, I chose to post it again because it shows Maggie, Lucky, and Alli back in January. In my last couple of posts I asked everyone to hold Karin and Lucky in their prayers as Lucky struggled with an unknown health issue. Unfortunately, Lucky was returned to NEADS in August as Karin was placed at the "top" of the client list to receive a new dog. Karin is not yet ready to entertain the idea of a new companion and holds out hope that something can be done for Lucky. While it appears that his stamina issues have not been as apparent since returning to NEADS, one of our trainers feels that there could be something astray with his neck and/or spine. It would be great if an answer either way.....hopefully in Lucky's favor........could be found before a new dog becomes available for Karin. When playing "Devil's Advocate" recently, I asked her what she would do if she received a call from NEADS telling her that they had found another "perfect" match for her. She replied that she would have to find out if an answer to Lucky's health problem had been found.....if not she would probably choose to wait. I know that if the tables were turned I would most assuredly have the same response. I honestly cannot picture what my life would be like without Alli. It is truly amazing how quickly you become dependent on your service dog, and the love is truly "at first sight" and certainly mutually unconditional! No matter what Karin chooses to do when the time arrives I know that Ellen and I and the "girls", Maggie and Alli, will stand by her for support with an arm around her so that she knows she is not alone..........

Ellen and "Maggie" and "Alli" and I went to visit Karin for support and love shortly after Lucky left. I've often said that while Alli may be the designated "class clown" she definitely knows when she is working, when her crazy personality is appropriate, and when it's not. When we arrived at Karin's, Ellen and Maggie were already there and I believe that both Alli and Maggie sensed Lucky's absence. Alli enjoyed her visit, but she was much more subdued than she normally is at Karin's, and I didn't need to repeat a single command. ***(I try to very rarely repeat, but sometimes a stern look from me is needed to accompany a command when in an active environment......not so this time!)

I know that it can be very scary when you think your service dog is ill or injured. I have taken Alli to the vet a couple of times when I've found "lumps". Once it was a piece of stick which had gotten under the skin on her elbow, and a couple of weeks ago it was where the rib goes from bone to primarily cartilage. I give Alli a "massage" almost every night when I go to bed, so I don't know how I missed this latest bump all these months......nonetheless, it feels the same as when my children were small (they all have asthma) and they became ill suddenly. I've always been very calm on the outside when in emergent situations but that certainly doesn't reflect how I feel on the inside. I often muse over my love for Alli, especially when my friend's granddaughter, Olivia, falls asleep with a hand on Alli's head as it rests on her car seat. As "Liv" drops off to sleep she whispers....."I love Alli"........

Tough Times and New Life!!!!!

Isn't amazing how in the midst of uncertainty and chaos a little peace seems to appear to make everything seem worthwhile!?! As I mentioned in my last post, Lucky is having some serious health issues and despite undergoing a barrage of tests the powers that be are still unable to find a cause. He continues to collapse under exertion and is not always able to get himself up. Karin continues to to stay strong but has no idea where this will lead or even whether there is to be a positive outcome. I hope you will all continue to hold Karin and Lucky in your prayers and think good thoughts for them often.

And there is was..........the peace one looks for when it seems unattainable. My oldest daughter, Bethany, and her husband, Frank, brought a beautiful baby girl into the world nearly a week early. Madaline Lorraine Russo arrived at exactly 3:00 am on Monday, August 2nd. She weighed in at 6 lbs 7.4 oz and was 19 1/2" long/tall. I was blessed to be present and just as I said at the births of my 3 children it is indeed the most awesome gift one can experience. Bethany asked me to be with them since I delivered her and her siblings using the techniques I learned in "Lamaze" class and they were unable to attend any such classes. They both did great! A little less than 12 hours after Bethany arrived at the hospital Maddy was born!

Now, perhaps you're wondering how Alli fits into all this.....or perhaps not. Either way, I'm going to tell you. We had 2 previous visits to the birth center at the hospital. The first was due to a probable migraine but the doctor wanted to be sure it wasn't something more serious, toxemia, etc. The second visit was because Bethany had early labor contractions and severe back labor/pains so we spent the night. In any case, Alli was just fine each time. She pretty much slept the whole time, unless she heard me move, then her head would pop up and she'd wait for me to give her a command. So, when we showed up Sunday afternoon and the nurses asked if she'd be okay considering that sometimes it can get loud if the mom yells or winces. I said that she would be fine(I actually wasn't sure how she'd react under those conditions but I had faith that she could do it). As before, Alli slept until I fed her.....I came prepared for a long stay. She did just fine until I went out to the family waiting room so that Bethany and Frankie could get some much needed rest. Alli behaved as usual, except she just couldn't settle down. She would lay down when told to but she just kept looking around, watching the door into the center and looking up at me. Like a new mother I went through a mental checklist; she had her exercise, she was fed, had her veggies, plenty of water and I took her out shortly before we went to the waiting room. I had noticed earlier in Bethany's room that she had laid next to the hospital bed a few times and watched me all the while. I started to wonder if she was anxious because she knew that something was about to happen. Right around 2 a.m. Frankie came to get us as Bethany was ready to begin pushing. Alli knew exactly where we were going. She turned before I told her and then went right for Bethany's door when we arrived. She walked right in and curled up on her blanket which I had placed by the wall out of the way. Within 5 minutes she was OUT! She was soooooo comfortable that she snored a bit and had a dream.........one in which she was obviously running somewhere because her paws looked like she was trotting on her side! Since Bethany had an epidural the room was relatively quiet......almost peaceful as she brought their daughter into the world. Alli continued to sleep away the time even with Maddy letting everyone know she had arrived, the nurses moving about the room weighing and readying Maddy for her parents......and me.......running around playing photographer trying to get pictures so that Bethany and Frankie could look back upon the birth of their first child with a smile.

The thing that really stuck with me about the birth.....besides Maddy......came when I thanked the doctor for an awesome delivery and added, "I guess Alli did just fine!". She said she was so happy to have been present and that she really liked having Alli present. She said Alli added a calming effect to the experience for her and she felt sure Alli had done the same for the rest of us as well. I feel I can answer my own question, "is there no end to what Alli can do to help and comfort". The answer is a resounding "YES"! She is truly the answer to all my prayers.

Prayers for Karin and Lucky

I know I used this photo in an earlier post, but I have a very special favor to ask anyone who may read this blog. This pic shows the four of us......classmates at NEADS when we received our new partners; Karin and Lucky on the left, then Ellen and Maggie, Eddie and Houdini, and finally Alli and me.

As you can see, we are all smiling thanks mainly to having our dogs in our lives. The dogs have made our individual difficulties bearable and even forgotten from time to time. They have so improved each of our quality of life that the smiles have replaced the look of uncertainty and doubt that have been present for far too long. Unfortunately, along with the gladness of our amazing gift.....our canine partner.......comes heartache when we must see our dog suffer and feel that we are unable to help ease the pain/discomfort.

Such is the case at the present time for Karin and Lucky. Karin has been able to flourish since receiving Lucky and he too has felt the blessing of her love. Right now, however, Lucky is undergoing a multitude of tests to determine the nature of his enlarged heart. He has become increasingly sluggish and upon examination was found to have an enlarged heart. Karin, herself, deals with constant pain, type 1 diabetes,and the effects of a serious car accident many years ago. Now, with concern for Lucky's health it is very difficult for Karin to hang onto her own positive emotions knowing how it has been Lucky who has, in essence, given Karin a new lease on life.....so to speak.

So, I have come to the favor I need to ask. Please hold Karin and Lucky in your prayers. Pray for Lucky's health to return so that Karin and he may once again be the amazing team they have grown into, and were meant to be. And, pray also for Karin that she may have the strength to see them both through and the good health she is so deserving of.

Thank You All
Wendy

".......What a Week!!!"

First of All, I have to apologize in advance for the poor punctuation but I'm really not feeling so great so I'm just typing. (Humidity is one of the worst condition for my breathing and it's taking a toll on me) Anyway, I realize that Alli really does get around, and of course she insists I accompany her! It has been good for me because it gets me out socializing but as Mark says I have to be mindful of my limits. I assure him that I am mindful, it just always seems worth it to carry on and then pay for it later! So, it started with NEADS Summer Graduation on Sunday, the 6th of June........so I guess it's actually 2 weeks! I actually "posted" on the 7th, but this is how it went: Summer Grad. on the 6th, a day at a good friend's summer house in Pawcatuck on the 8th, a drive down to Norwalk to Scandia for our Swedish food on the 9th(of course we forgot that it's now summer days/hours so it wasn't open!!!), on the 10th we went to the graduation for the inmates who are involved in the NEADS training program at MCI Framingham(MA), a trip to NYC to see Rascal Flatts on the Today Show for Bethany's 27th b-day on Friday the 11th(yikes! Do I really have a daughter that old?!?), on Saturday the 12th Alli and I walked in the Greater Middletown American Cancer Society's "Relay For Life", ( we walked a little more on Sunday morning the 13th before the "Relay" ended), later in the day on the 13th Alli, Em, and I went to Mohegan Sun for the "James Taylor/Carole King" concert and stayed over as usual......but of course that meant more walking, on the 16th Em had an eye appointment in the morning and then I had an interview for a project on pain that I'm a part of(I'll explain more below), And then on Thursday the 17th a photographer followed Alli and I for the day as part of the same project...........and, finally, on Friday and Saturday Em, Alli and I did just a few errands early each day. WOW!!! It sounds like even more than I thought! I started to fade even before the concert but had to push through the week as always.......I always feel that I have to follow through on everything I set out to do! Needless to say I paid a pretty steep price.....and continue to do so!

Of course I have a reason for doing all of the above.....and it always makes sense to me. While we were in NYC for the concert at the Today Show, we took the time to go to the Central Park Zoo. I had never been there, and as you can see above, Alli absolutely loved it!(The picture is a bit blurry but the others were in the dark!) She just wanted to soak it all in. She especially liked the reptile/bird etc. house. She was wowed by the dark "bat cave" which reminded me of the tanks at the aquariums except there must have been at least one hundred bats continuously flying around. The above picture shows her looking at some birds in the "tropical" area. She was actually just about perfect the whole day except early on when we discovered she must not have been exposed to pigeons before. Oh, my, gosh! She surely wanted to bring one of those home!!! We walked in the "relay" in memory of my closest friend's brother Dan Woronick, also in memory of my mom(4/22/07). The picture shows Alli in the adult poncho that I tailored just for her! The meteorologists predicted rain so we came prepared! The poncho had a hood but not only did Alli not like it but when it was on it came all the way down to her nose totally blinding her!(She did look adorable in it! I don't normally like large dogs in clothing but boy did it thunder/lightening and POUR!!!! The concert is self explanatory.....at least to me! They are both among my favorites, especially James Taylor. I think it might very well be the best concert/show I've ever seen. They were amazing!

The "biggie" is the project I've been asked to participate in. It is sponsored by the CT Pain Foundation and is called the "INvisible Project". It highlights 15 individuals with various diseases/disorders.......(with me being the "unknown"), and how they live their daily lives coping with chronic pain. The cause of the pain is often "invisible" but that doesn't mean it isn't very real. I've been dealing with it for the better part of 5 years, with the pain steadily increasing over time. At the foundations' meeting in NYC in September of this year, there will be a photo array of each of the participants and we'll be introduced at the meeting.(There will be an additional mtng. in Connecticut shortly thereafter.) Then, the photos along with the interviews will be featured in the foundation magazine. The idea is to bring to light how there are many who are able to live their lives with chronic pain and hopefully help those who think it can't be done. It also helps others find the help they may need through support and networking. I think it is so worthwhile especially since Alli has been my #1 pain reliever since November......though I will soon be seeking medical advice and help to deal with the ever increasing pain in my limbs, back and head.

I'm sure there's more that I could be saying, but it is nearly 1:00 am on the 21st and I'm beat!! (I'm don't know why the posting time says it's nearly 41/2 hrs earlier, the time on my laptop says 12:56 am! And that's the right time!)
Until next time.........

Summer Graduation, New Friends

I have to begin by acknowledging the above photo! When Alli was at
MCI Framingham she had an amazing weekend puppy raiser, Elizabeth, who took her to Texas for Christmas '08. In the "puppy album" that Alli's inmate/handler Pam put together for me there is a page near the end about that trip. The page holds several pictures including one of Alli in "Utopia"!!! She is doing just as she is above.......taking in the sun and sand.......literally! She loves to run headstrong into the water, swim, dunk her head underwater, swim some more, then leap out of the water like a skipping stone and roll, shimmy, and roll some more in the sand. Each time she goes to the beach it's like the first time all over again....it's wonderful! Like watching an infant discovering they can crawl!

Now, to Summer Graduation for NEADS. Alli and I went with a very close friend, who was unable to make it to our graduation, and my daughter Em. We thought that the young lady who did a fundraiser for us was going to present her check to NEADS......but she wasn't able to be there. I really didn't mind, though, because I had nearly the same emotional response that I had at mine. Just knowing that these strong, brave, independent individuals would be able to experience the same emotions that I have.......love, freedom, increased independence and a sense of feeling needed........all from gaining a new partner, and yes a confidant made the whole day worthwhile.

We began the day with lunch at a local establishment in Leominster with new found friends including a team that graduated from NEADS about a year ago, her husband, her dogs' puppy raiser, a wonderful wounded warrior who was graduating this time with his dog, his puppy raiser and her mother. The graduate, Doug, had come all the way from South Carolina just finishing his training this past Friday. He was not able to have any friends or family present so we all said that we would be honored to be his family. He is a wonderful gentlemen, very quick witted, always smiling and so engaging that you barely notice that he's in a wheel chair and has one leg amputated above the knee. He said he'd love to have us all as his family but he expected to hear a lot of "whooping and hollering"! Needless to say......everyone heard it! How deserving Doug is to receive a service dog, Scooter, and how blessed they both are to have each other. While everyone there was receiving either a "hearing dog" or "service dog" as at my graduation, it was new, and moving just the same. It's so wonderful knowing that I am connected with an organization that can change a person's life as well as their outlook on life with the addition of such a specialized partner that is always there for them wherever they may go.

Before I ramble on all night I should close, but not before sharing an amazing story that really made the day perfect. Picture two close friends, one slightly older than the other, growing up together only to be separated as they neared "adulthood". Now picture the same two friends being in the same place years later and recognizing each other and giving one another a warm embrace. No words are necessary, merely a look knowing each remembers the other.Now, picture these two friends as two dogs! This was the scene when Alli met her friend Granite on Sunday. The two were together at MCI Framingham at the same time, Alli slightly older than Granite. I was told that Granite was in the graduating class and I scanned the room looking for the person that I was told was his partner. When I found him shortly before the ceremony began I quickly headed over with Alli to see this dog who appears in Alli's "puppy" album over and over. Now, Alli is almost always very hyper when she meets another dog. It was down right amazing! She looked at Granite, Granite looked at her. She took a calm step toward him, and he did the same. Then, the amazing occurred! Alli and Granite stood nose to nose, and calmly nuzzled each other! They had not seen each other since probably April of '09. Then, after a moment, Alli got down in a playful stance(looks like she's bowing), and Granite barked and jumped toward her, all four feet off the ground. I know that now when I hear someone say "The world is going to the dogs" I can smile knowing that that's not so bad!

Talk to you again soon!
Wendy

Alli Meets Prudence Island..........and the Crab!!!!

How wonderful it was to be able to go out to the
house and not be afraid of falling while alone!!! Alli loved the whole experience.....especially swimming and squirming around on her back in the sand! She will retrieve anything you ask her to so when that is combined with her crazy love of swimming she is absolutely in heaven! She doesn't even mind the lead she has to be hooked to since the area is not enclosed. I found a very light weight 50' marine line so it doesn't get too heavy when it's wet. Since I can't have the pressure of the water on my chest I can no longer swim but we had lots of fun just the same. I am attaching this photo and then a brief video at the end in which she goes crazy over a very (yuck!!) dead horseshoe crab to show that, yes, a service dog's life is not only work, work, work! Because she has the large head with the droopy eyes and huge jowls(I've been told that it's because she is American and English Lab) people constantly tell me that she looks sad. They don't see her when she's at home or the dog park where she absolutely unwinds and goes crazy. When she plays with 3 other labs at the park, I swear that it reminds me of the huge bucks on the old "Mutual of Omaha" show, bumping their chests when it's mating time!!!! While it was great to be on the island with Alli, I don't think I can continue to make the trip alone to the ferry in Bristol. Highway driving used to be easier than local driving just because I wouldn't have to count on my leg being steady with the brake pedal constantly as is necessary with local traffic. Now, though, the pain in my limbs and especially my back is making it almost impossible to sit long enough(1 1/2 hrs)to get to P I. For the time being I'll trudge through it just because it's like a sanctuary for me so I'll try to ignore the pain. Mark always says that I need to learn that I have limits because 1 day's activity means at least 1....if not 2 day's of being totally spent and usually on my bed. I do know my limits. I just have to decide if the activity is worth the pain........more times than not I go for it.......just because I'm not ready to "give in" yet. With the summer months, however, I will be in most of the time anyway because I can't be out when the humidity even begins to rise. I guess breathing is more important than fun most of the time! At least it will probably mean that I'll post more often!

Graduation.......continued!!!!

So, I've mentioned that when I trained with Alli in November, there were 3 other great people. We finally got a picture of the 4 of us at graduation on March 7th. Karin and Lucky, Ellen and Magpie(Maggie) and, Eddie and Houdini...... with Alli and me on the far right. It was so good to see them all again........I know Alli was really happy to see them! Alli always slouches when she sits so she looks so small, but she is actually almost as big as Lucky, just about 2 lbs lighter and probably only an inch or two shorter. The 2 in the middle, Maggie and Houdini, are sister and brother and you can see how much smaller she is. They are all beautiful labs, with the most amazing temperaments. They each also have unique personalities.....I'm not sure that it's necessarily the best thing, but I guess you would call Alli the "class clown".....if there was one. Ellen is in Wisconsin having surgery to help her continue to walk and not be strapped to a power wheel chair all the time. I hope all who read this post will send their prayers of wellness and recovery her way.

I feel very fortunate to have met these 3 strong, wonderful people. They have each helped me in one way or another realize that dealing openly with my illness is not a sign of "giving in". I tried for so long to act as "business as usual" and usually paid the price. It's nice from time to time to talk with others also dealing with chronic illness. It's never a "pity party" as one might think. Far from it. You find yourself gaining strength and definitely encouragement from one another. There's actually a type of security in knowing that you're not alone with your feelings and/or thoughts where your illness is concerned. It's even easier to deal with your day to day issues, such as doctor visits and your comfort level in general.

So, you see these dogs have really opened up a renewed level of adventure. I mentioned in an earlier post that Alli and I had visited a nursery school, something I hope to do more of. Well, my associate pastor is thinking of having me bring Alli when she makes some calls at one of our local nursing homes. Because Alli is already a trained service dog......."card carrying" even....... she is already used to wheel chairs, walkers, and hospital sounds and smells. These are all things a "therapy" type dog must become accustomed to before they can be certified. I obviously have a lot of new experiences to look forward to.

One last thing. I finally got the date for my Social Security Disability hearing. April 19th. Please think positive thoughts for me on that day!!!! After the 2 denials, you automatically go to a hearing. The problem is that my attorney filed for the hearing by the required December 2008 date. My attorney told us that the wait can be up to 1 year from the Dec. '08 date. I was not notified of the hearing date until February of this year!!! So, I've been unable to work since March of 2007. That's a heck of a long time to go without a paycheck. Mark has been working a second job to make up for it. He will probably keep it when I'm approved, just cut back and be firm about when he will and will not work.

I will post again in a day or two. I plan on uploading a picture of Alli and Houdini.........
They are so cute together!!!